Adventures with Crap Porsches

Floating around somewhere on my fictitious list of goals is one simple one - "Do a few PCA DE events." Out of all the goals, that's an easy one because you just sign up, send some cash and run the event. Well, I guess it isn't really that easy because I can't keep any of my Porsches running long enough to accomplish it.

Saturday morning I'm driving out to St. James to pick up an engine that came out of an '86 944 NA. I need it for my 924SE. Why waste a weekend driving to get an engine that may or may not run? That question really got me thinking about how and why I am working on these cars. What is the real reason for all the headaches? Is it worth it?

After a little soul searching, I realized I drive a lot. When I get stuck driving a car to work every day that isn't fun, I get a little depressed. Retarded? Yes. Hey, everyone has got their quirks. I just happen to get a lot of satisfaction from driving a car that is fast, balanced, well engineered, unique, and understated.

I don't like luxuries like power locks, GPS, computers, fancy seats, or any bling. I want something simple, utilitarian, uncomfortable almost. I want to have to watch the gauges to make sure the engine isn't going to grenade itself. I want to shift. I want to feel the road. I want to know exactly when the car is going to break loose and I want to be confident the car will let me straighten it out. Finally, I want my car to be a little beat up so I don't have to worry about door dings or rock chips.

For whatever reason, old, water cooled Porsches just feel right. About a year ago I decided to buy another one. I wanted something special, though, so I started the search for an '88 924SE. The SE was an option package Porsche offered in 1988 that was sold as a track ready, lightened, utilitarian car. Sunroofs and AC were optional. The car came with a lightweight, cloth interior, minimal insulation, manual windows/locks, M030 suspension with adjustable ride height and dampeners. The engines for the '88 year had higher compression than their predecessors which increased HP slightly. They were all black with a maroon interior and tiny mud flaps. Porsche only sent 500 of them to the United States.

It took a few months, but I finally found THE ONE on the Louisville Craigslist in November, 2008. I talked to the seller several times on the phone and decided to pull the trigger. It had some issues, but the majority of the SE parts were intact and the numbers matched. It did not have a sunroof which made it even more rare. I bought it sight unseen for a price that took into account it was an SE that was in good shape, but needed maintenance... whoops. When it arrived in my driveway I knew I made a mistake.

It, uhh.... had some issues. I was pissed, but decided that I was going to stick with it. Like a good owner, I re-did the belts, seals, struts, bushings, etc. It needed fuel injectors, had some spark issues, and it had little compression in cyl #2. That pissed me off more than anything. Even the engine was shot. I decided to put it together and just drive it until the engine died.

Little did I know, the engine would blow on the second test drive.

What to do? I really missed the power that our M Roadster had - approx 250 HP - and I was pretty sick of dealing with the timing belts and leaky seals on the 4cyl. Swapping a Chevy V8 (specifically, an LSx) into a 924/944/968's chassis seems to be a popular modification. There are web forums and plenty of people out there willing to lend advice and machine parts. Everyone who has driven one raves about it. The swap seemed like a no-brainer until the voice of reason chimed-in.

R was concerned about me dumping a ton of time and money into a car that we both couldn't enjoy together. She had issues with the comfort, driveability, and general ugliness of the finished product. She's not too big on driving or riding in a smelly POS no matter how fast it is. I couldn't come up with a decent argument. There wasn't one.

The engine had to come out of the 924SE so I have been slowly removing it while trying to decide what I am going to get for replacement. On Tuesday I had a flash of genius.

While deciding what kind of car to buy last year, I found a local guy who was taking the drivetrain out of his black on black 968 to swap into his 951 S. At the time I thought it might be fun to put his 951 drivetrain into the 968 and just drive that. He was in no hurry and I found the 924SE. That was that.

His 968 is a pretty car with a very nice interior. R has always liked the updated styling of the 968... Here is the genius idea - why not put an LS1 in a pretty 968 and have the best of both worlds? I get my geeky fast hybrid, and R has a pretty car she might actually drive. In addition, the chassis, brakes, and transaxle from the 968 can handle a lot more power than my 924SE. So, it will be a better fit in general.

I contacted the guy and, well, he's still working on the swap. The 968 roller should be available in a few weeks (months?) I'm not committed to doing it. My plan is to put a stock engine in the 924SE (the one i'm picking up Saturday) and get the car drivable. Eventually, and if the price is right, I'll buy this guy's 968 roller (and the Turbo S LSD 5 speed transmission he has sitting in his garage(!)) and build myself a mean little 400 HP car.